What is Gottman Couples and Marriage Therapy?
Gottman Couples Therapy is an approach that helps couples understand and manage their relationship dynamics through practical, research-based methods. It emphasizes enhancing friendship, improving communication, and addressing specific areas of conflict. This method not only fosters emotional closeness but also provides couples with tools to manage relationship challenges effectively.
Core Principles of the Gottman Method
Build Love Maps
Love Maps are the foundation of a strong relationship. In Gottman therapy, couples deepen their understanding of each other’s inner world by sharing hopes, dreams, worries, and histories.
Share Fondness and Admiration
Expressing appreciation and respect strengthens emotional bonds. Through exercises, couples learn to verbalize positive feelings, which builds a buffer against negativity.
Turn Towards Instead of Away
Couples are encouraged to acknowledge each other’s bids for attention and support. Small gestures, like listening or showing interest, build emotional connection and resilience.
The Positive Perspective
The Positive Perspective helps couples approach each other with kindness and assume the best of intentions, even during conflict.
Manage Conflict Constructively
Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but Gottman therapy teaches couples to address issues in a healthy way. Couples learn skills for conflict management rather than expecting complete resolution of differences.
Make Life Dreams Come True
By supporting each other’s dreams and goals, couples grow together rather than apart. Gottman therapy fosters a sense of shared purpose and individual growth.
Create Shared Meaning
Creating rituals and traditions that both partners value strengthens the partnership. Whether it’s a family tradition or a weekly date night, shared meaning builds a cohesive relationship.
How Gottman Couples Therapy Works
Step 1: Relationship Assessment
Gottman Couples Therapy begins with a thorough assessment. Couples complete questionnaires about their relationship strengths, challenges, and patterns. The therapist also conducts individual and joint interviews, gaining a comprehensive view of the relationship dynamics.
Step 2: Customized Therapy Plan
Based on the assessment, the therapist designs a plan tailored to the couple’s unique needs, focusing on strengthening bonds, managing conflict, and deepening intimacy. The approach is practical, with specific exercises and tools to improve communication, handle conflicts, and rebuild trust.
Step 3: Skill-Building Exercises
Therapy sessions often include interactive exercises that can be practiced both in and outside of sessions. Couples learn essential skills for listening, responding constructively, and de-escalating conflicts. The goal is to develop healthy patterns that last beyond therapy.
Step 4: Ongoing Support and Maintenance
As couples progress, they have opportunities to build on their skills and continue growth. Many couples find value in periodic check-ins, either through follow-up sessions or online resources provided by the therapist.


Benefits of Gottman Couples Therapy
Enhanced Communication
Learn proven techniques for more effective, compassionate, and open communication.
Conflict Resolution Skills
Gain tools to address disagreements constructively and prevent escalation.
Deeper Connection and Intimacy
Rekindle the romance, connection, and understanding that brought you together.
Improved Trust and Respect
Through exercises in appreciation and empathy, couples learn to restore and strengthen mutual respect.
Long-Term Relationship Satisfaction
Building a “Sound Relationship House” provides a stable foundation, helping couples weather future challenges.
Who Can Benefit from Gottman Couples Therapy?
Gottman Couples Therapy is ideal for couples at any stage of their relationship. Whether you’re newly engaged, navigating the early years of marriage, managing the demands of parenthood, or experiencing challenges after many years together, the Gottman Method provides tools to build a resilient and happy relationship.
This approach also addresses specific concerns, such as:
- Rebuilding trust after an affair
- Improving communication
- Managing ongoing conflicts
- Addressing issues related to parenting
- Strengthening intimacy
Ready to begin?
If you’re interested in learning more about how Gottman Couples Therapy can help you and your partner, reach out to schedule an initial consultation. Taking this step can help you develop the tools and skills to nurture a loving, healthy relationship for years to come.
Let’s work together to build a relationship that lasts.

How we can work with you
We provide individual counselling (both in-person and over the phone).
Other treatments we offer
EMDR - Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing
EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, and it’s an integrative therapy used specifically for clients who have experienced trauma and many other mental health issues. It has been proven very effective in dealing with these conditions.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)
CBT, or Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, is a practical and short-term type of psychotherapy, useful in treating conditions like depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress conditions. It works by helping clients focus on the present, on the problems that come up in day-to-day life.
Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT)
DBT is a modified form of CBT, and it aims to teach people how to live in the moment, develop healthy ways to cope with stress, regulate their emotions, and improve their relationships with others.
Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples (EFT) and for individuals (EFIT)
EFIT, or Emotionally Focused Individual Therapy, is a variation of the well-known and successful EFT (Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy)
Play Therapy
Play Therapy is a highly regarded and evidence-based therapeutic modality for children.